force feeding

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It's already in my stomach, filling it to the brink. These feelings are my food and my insatiable hunger for him are not false substances. Appetite gone along with the options to choose anything else. I'd even be happy with a drive through, a doggy bag and a tonne of weight with him, brief and harmful. But he is raw food. It's the type of food I am most naturally attracted to. He's all the vitamins I want, nurturing or not. I'm so full up on him I couldn't eat another thing. Gluttony comes when you want more, I want less of a menu of choices because he is always my first choice. I'll bite off more than I can chew just so I can share it with him. The chewed bits. The way a baby bird is fed - a little more used, a little more softer and a little more loving. But I don't place the order as my stomach is sickly full and his plate too full to add another thing or too content to be shared. So I don't, can't and won't eat. I'm in a deficit life without him, and I'm losing.